Discussion on Lorna
>> What stands out for you about Lorna’s perspective on the incident?
>> If you were an adult in Lorna’s life (e.g. teacher, parent) what would you want her to consider that was not apparent in her perspective on the incident? What if you were one of her peers?
If I was an adult in Lorna's life I would have encouraged the same thing. Often when students and I talk about another student who is struggleing either by bullying other people or being bullied I encourage my students to be nice to them and befriend them if they can. At the very least go out of thier way to smile and say good morning. Lorna did a great thing by not getting wrapped up in the drama and taking on Sue as a friend based of what she was seeing instead of looking at everyone else.
Lorna presents her case in a very low-key way, but what she did is actually quite courageous. She did not know exactly what Sue had done but she decided that the punishment didn't fit the crime, although she believed that whatever was done must be very bad to warrant such a long period of ostracization. However, just to reach out to Sue, when that was clearly against the social norms, was courageous.
I do believe that Lorna would of stuck up for what she knew was to be wrong.
I think she didn't because she herself did not want be noticed by these bulling students.
I also feel Lorna was not indifferent to the situation. I think our school system should
provide counsling for Bully's, Victiams, and By Standers.
I believe that this is the result of a special group of student at that age that should have been allowed to oversee the situation with guidance and supervision. this would have resulted in teenagers developing an authoritative governance for themselves that would have outweighed the negative influence.
Lorna was one of the few people in this incident that did not engage in the tormenting of Sue. Even though she didn't try to stop all of the students ostracisng Sue she knew that it wasn't right to involve herself in that group no matter what the reason is that caused the whole incident. I think her fear of being at the wrong of end of the bullying held her back from becoming an upstander in this scenario. Then again nobody's perfect and I'm sure that some people would say that they would help Sue but not realize how hard it is in real life than to read about the incident and say "I would have helped her."
If I was an adult in the issue I would have wanted her to help Sue despite her fear of being picked on. She morally knows that the right thing to do is to help Sue but she does not want to lose friends because of their opinion on Sue. I would say to her that if her friends are doing such cruel things to Sue than she shouldn't be friends with them in the first place.
I think that Lorna’s role in the incident was somewhere between that of an “upstander” and a “bystander” (showing again that these roles are not so rigid). In the heat of the conflict during seventh grade, she neither participated nor went out of her way to befriend Sue. She was able to stay uninvolved, which is impressive in and of itself, as it seems that much of the grade was caught up in Sue’s downfall. She was most likely focused almost entirely on her life outside of school, where she seems to have had a good support system. She did become Sue’s friend eventually, despite other people’s still negative opinions of her, though after things had cooled down a lot.
I would be interested to know whether or not Lorna would have stood up for Sue in seventh grade if the bullying had been “worse,” say physical even. One of the most dangerous aspects of ostracism is that it can be too easily justified as “not that bad” (“well, at least the victim is not being physically abused” and so on). To stand up for Sue would have been to socially sacrifice herself entirely. Though Lorna did not seem to care about being popular, she too feared becoming the victim of her peers.
I wonder why Lorna was so mature and calm about the whole situation. Is it because she was interviewed only after the fact? (In 8th grade) Or more just because she, as a person, has a much more mature outlook on life and the fight? Also, I wonder what role Lorna's race played in the incident. Had she encountered a similar type of bullying in her past, and was thus more sympathetic towards Sue?
What struck me the most was not only that Lorna seemed to be the first one to offer to be friends when Sue, even when that wasn't a popular decision, but that Lorna didn't give into the hysteria: "She said - people said that she said something about me, but she didn't say it to my face." It takes an incredible amount of self awareness to not give in to peer pressure.
If I was an adult in Lorna's life, I would ask Lorna about her thought processing on going to a teacher, parents, etc. to express her concern. It doesn't look like Lorna did that but that she came to the right decision on her own. I would want to know if she did or why she didn't talk to an adult about this incident.
Most of Lorna's peers were the ones who were ostracizing Sue, I wouldn't be surprised if some of her peers ostracized her for her decision not to give in to the social climate of hostility.
I find Jenny Berz's comments useful here; without much context for Lorna's experience I questioned how she was able to find the "courage" Dennis Barr describes. Jenny underscores the enormous role not only family but community support and stability plays in adolescent development and interaction.
I admire Lorna's courage in the face of adversity. she handled a very difficult situation very well.
As a teacher, I would have to reminder that she also could become a target of being frozen out of friendships. Lastly, being African American did not help.